The Deep South (Carolina)

I always sit in the ass end of the plane because most people don't want to sit there. I understand their reasoning. You're the last to get off the plane, right next to the bathroom and the seats don't recline. But for a big guy like me it's great because that means when I sit there, there's a pretty good chance that no one will sit next to me, which outweighs the negatives.

My brother James moved to Columbia, South Carolina in April 2009 to be closer to his fiancée Melissa, who moved there in November 2008. Although my Dad has moved around the country numerous times since my parents divorce, he traveled often and made it back here or flew me out to see him enough that it never seemed like he was gone. My relationship with my big brother is so much different that with my Dad, so I have definitely noticed he's not here in Wisconsin anymore, and I have missed hanging out with him. But moving away was the right thing to do for various reasons (most of which I won't get into today) but the most important one was to be with his fiancée, who is a Police Officer in Columbia They've only been back here twice since moving out there due to monetary and time off from work restrictions. Neither of those interfere with my lifestyle so I decided to visit them. Working 2 jobs in from April - September makes scheduling difficult, and my original attempt to get out there in June 2009 was pushed back 5 months until November 19. I got on a plane on a Thursday night, sat in the ass end, lost an hour, went to 3 airports (Milwaukee, Detroit and Columbia) and finally got to see James + Melissa.

After my beer, I went to Wendy's. After overpaying for my beer, I was overjoyed to see that this joint had a value menu. I wasn't very hungry, which turned out to be a good thing because the Value Menu was very limited. There weren't any burgers or chicken sandwiches on it, so I got two 5-piece nuggets and a value fry. The 5-piece nuggets were normal sized, but the fries were the tiniest size that I have ever seen in my life. I ordered value sized, not midget sized. Look how small they look next to me. I can only imagine how they would look in Joey Kanz's hand...

When I arrived at the airport I was the only one there. It was like Zombies took over and everyone was dead. That or it was a small airport and it was 11:30PM on a Thursday night. I always have a hard time distinguishing between the two. Since I was now down South, I sat in a rocking chair and pretended to listen to an old man tell stories about how the South should have and really did win the Civil War. Then he drank moonshine out of a giant jug, played banjo while his friend played a washboard and we had a hootenanny. It was so much fun, but eventually James and Melissa arrived to pick me up. Then the real adventures could begin. I wanted to see how these Southern folks party.

I had about an hour to kill in Detroit between flights, so I did what any sensible 21+ year old person would do at an airport - drink. The Irish Pub was the closest bar to my gate, so I stopped and grabbed a Harp. I had to get something Irish at The Irish Pub, although it cost like $9. Even if I would have gotten a Miller Lite or some shit, it still probably would have been expensive.

James + Melissa got a dog about 6 months ago and they named her Baya. I don't know what that means or where it came from, but I decided to rename her Scott Baya while I was down there. She's still just a puppy, so she has tons of energy. Thankfully she has two high energy people to chase her around and put up with her craziness.

James only had Bud Light in his fridge. Man oh man the South changes people. He claimed that a friend brought it over, but I didn't believe him. I really needed an alcoholic beverage, so closed my eyes and slammed the filthy stuff. It was difficult to do, but I always drink on vacation. Then I must always be on vacation cause I always drink.

The ass end of the plane also allows me to spread out a little bit and have some privacy, which is nice when I'm trying to work on my website. I don't mind people taking a peek at this crap and reading the comments when I put them online, but when I am in the creative process, I really don't like people staring over my shoulder and judging me. The last thing that I need is for people to tell me what I can and can't put on this site. And offer their opinions on the pictures. It's not that I don' care, it's that this is my perspective and interpretation of events I witness.