World Series of Beer Pong 4

After leaving Downtown we took the bus all the way to the South end of the Strip so that we could go to the greatest restaurant in the entire world: In-N-Out Burger. But first we would have to walk over the Brooklyn Bridge to get there. Not the real one, the one outside of the New York New York Casino. Although I would have walked across the real one to get to In-N-Out Burger. I would walk across Middle Earth and into the fiery depths of Mordor to get one of those meaty delicacies. But thankfully me and Samwise Gamgee didn't have to do that.

Walking around Las Vegas at night is kinda cool, especially if you're in to large overblown spectacles. I could go either way on it, but I didn't have time to stop and admire/make fun of the statues/buildings because I had burgers on the brain. Kanz's giant head almost blocked out the Excalibur castle, which would have done Las Vegas a favor, but unfortunately he moved on in search of a burger big enough to tame his man-sized hunger.

I-15 runs directly behind the Strip, and it was all that stood between us and the In-N-Out Burger. If you've never been there, let me tell you that the traffic is Las Vegas is ridiculous. We seriously would have been risking our lives trying to cross the overpass across the freeway to get there, so we boarded another bus to drive us the 3 blocks to our destination. The 10 minute wait on the bus was worth not dying, even if we had to wait longer to get those tasty burgers. But just like Harold and Kumar, we finally got to our golden paradise burger joint.

Nobody should be this happy about a hamburger, right? After all it's just some beef and cheese on a bun. Wrong. This is not just a hamburger, it is an In-N-Out Burger, and it is one of the most delicious things on all of God's green Earth. It should be illegal for these things to taste this good, but I'm glad that it isn't because I don't need a criminal record just for enjoying a burger. Just look at the pure joy in my eyes. It's like that kid on Christmas morning that finally got that pony they've been asking for for their entire lives. But unlike that little kid, I would not regret asking for my In-N-Out Burger. Last time I checked, burgers don't eat, shit or need to be cared for.

Last year, this guy with a Boston accent told us about the In-N-Out Burger secret menu, which included things like Animal Fries and the 4x4 Burger, which he called a haat-stoppa (heart stopper). Kanz had been talking about wanting to take the 4x4 challenge (eating a burger that had 4 patties of meat, 4 slices of cheese, lettuce, tomato and special sauce) all year long, and tonight he finally got his wish. That sounded like one obnoxious burger, so I settled on the 3x3 (only 3 patties of meat and 3 slices of cheese) with some Animal Fries. We had been anticipating this moment for a whole year, and we were also pretty drunk, so this was one of the greatest days of our lives.