World Series of Beer Pong 4

I was able to find another late night owl to hang out with, and he came in the form of the one and only Matthew "Brodey" Callies. Thanks to his job as a bartender at Steny's, he too usually stays up into the odd hours of the night. But unlike Kanz, he wasn't partied out, so he walked with me along the Strip to see if anything was going on. We stopped by the Rockhouse at the Imperial Palace, because Port-o-Pong was staging an event, but it was really weak. They didn't even have beer pong going. So we went to Casino Royale for $1 Michelobs. I know, it's a bad beer, but $1 is $1.

It was now time for sleep, because it is necessary to wake up somewhat refreshed if you are planning on drinking all day and competing in a serious beer pong event. Despite all the craziness that went on today, I still couldn't lay down and go to sleep. It was only like midnight, which is way too darn early to go to sleep. I guess if you need your beauty rest, like Kanz, then it was ok to pass out like 3 hours ago. Ugly people like me, Vince Vaughn and Susan Sarandon look perpetually tired, and therefore no amount of sleep will do them good. So we just don't sleep and walk around like Zombies with giant bags under their eyes. I had to find something to do to pass the time, so I went roaming the halls of the hotel in search of soda and ice. Luckily I have an ice indicator that sounds whenever an ice machine is near, and I was able to find it in no time. But that only took me 1 minute, what the hell was I gonna do with the rest of the night before bed? I know - watch The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Since it's on every channel in every city, you'll always be able to watch it when you have nothing better to do. As I drifted off to sleep with short Carlton and fat Uncle Phil jokes in my head, I looked forward to a brand new day.

I had thought that Joey Kanz would be my right hand man, and that he would stick with me through think and thin. I thought wrong, since Kanz was apparently partied out. I hate to badmouth my friends, but you'd think that Kanz (who is used to staying up late thanks to his job at Vitucci's) would not be in bed this early. It especially confuses me because he is a good 4 years younger than me, and I was willing to stay up and party and he wasn't. I guess some things just don't make sense. C'mon Joey Kanz - wake up dude, it's Vegas!!

Before I knew it, it was night time, and the 1st day of WSoBP 4 was drawing to a close. There was still plenty of hours left in the day (it was around 7 pm, which is incredibly early for Vegas) but most of us were all tuckered out. You'll never understand until you do it yourself, but playing beer pong out here all day really tires you out. I looked out the window and noticed that the Flamingo was all lit up, so I figured that maybe I too should wake up and join the night. But finding someone to hang out with would be harder to find than I thought it would.

Brodey and I sat at the bar and had a couple of beers, and Brodey wondered aloud how they could clean and restock the bar if it never closes. I guess that's the kind of thing bartenders think about when they visit other bars. After a few cheap beers, I grabbed 2 $1 margaritas, and we took a walk along the Strip. There was very little going on for a Friday night, but it was a just a day after New Years. Most people must have been partied out like Joey Kanz. But not Brodey. Brodey was out trolling the strip with me for hookers. Or maybe just their playing cards. If you've ever been to Vegas you know that there's a bunch of Mexicans passing out hooker playing cards that have phone numbers on them if you want to call for a good time. The Mexicans that pass them out are relentless, and they even hand them to women and children. Funny city, Las Vegas. Brodey kept on collecting them, and although he wasn't actively seeking women in the prostitution business, we did find the pictures and names on the cards to be a humorous topic of debate. It's actually kind of gross when you think about it (sluts for money) but at that moment in time, collecting hooker trading cards was a hilarious and time wasting event. What else were we going to do, sleep?